The Wedding Etiquette Mistake You Didn't Know You Were Making
March 10, 2017
Manners matter, especially on the most important day of your life! But how do you deal with those sticky situations that will inevitably come up along the way? With the help of etiquette expert Myka Meier, founder and director of Beaumont Etiquette. From dealing with too many cooks in the kitchen to how to handle someone's uninvited plus one, Myka has all the answers!
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Can we include our wedding registry information with the wedding invitation?

I never advise to include wedding registry information on the save-the-date or invitation. The only place you should include your wedding registry information is on your website. You can also let your parents, grandparents and bridal party know every store and website you've registered at so that if someone asks them they can spread the word!

You can however include your registry information on or with your bridal shower invitation. After all, the whole point of the party is to shower the couple with gifts. You can print it on the invite or some stores can supply insert cards that can be slipped into the invitation envelope.

Can we invite some people to the ceremony and not the reception and vice versa?

If you want to have an intimate ceremony you can limit the people invited to watch as you recite your vows, and then have more friends and relatives join you at a reception afterwards. You cannot invite people to the ceremony and then not invite them to the reception. It would be seen as impolite, and there are better ways to save money, if that's the goal.

What do we do if someone shows up with a +1 who was'?t invited?

You be gracious and ask the ma'tre d' or your wedding planner to find him or her a seat. Yes, you may feel upset or even angry, but don?t make a scene or demand the person leave.

Can we have a small destination wedding and a larger reception when we get home?

Absolutely! Traveling to a destination can be hard on guests who don?t have the budget to get away, have small children or are ill and their doctor advised against traveling. If not everyone on your wedding guest list can make it to your destination, or you?d prefer a smaller guest list, you can have a larger celebration when you return from the wedding or your honeymoon.

That celebration can take any shape! You can have a dinner party, cocktail party, dinner and dancing reception. You can wear your wedding dress or buy a second one!

Just be sure to let your guests know on the reception invitation that you're married and you want to celebrate with them.

How many people should I take dress shopping with me?

Most bridal salons would recommend less than 5 people, and preferably no more than 3. It?s more important that you choose people to join you whose style opinions you trust. You may make several shopping appointments so you can invite different people to each one. If someone is buying the dress for you they should be invited to join in the fun if they are nearby. And if possible, you should include mom in at least one appointment.

You know what they say about too many cooks in the kitchen? They say the same thing about wedding dress shopping!

How do we tell guests that we don't want them using their cell phones during the ceremony?

Print your wish that your guests are in the moment with you and not viewing your ceremony through their screen in your wedding program. You can also have signage made and posted as guests enter.

If you're concerned some people won?t get the message, ask your officiant to make a light-hearted reference to guests shutting off their phones and refraining from taking photos or video during the ceremony. After all, you did hire professionals to capture this moment for you so your guests can relax and take it all in, and see the pro's picks on Instagram.

How do we let people know what they should wear to the wedding?

Dress code is usually implied by the date and time of your wedding, however it's always a good idea to clarify on the invitations if you?re concerned that someone may not know that after 6 p.m. on Saturday night means formal attire. You can have the dress code printed on a reception card insert that goes in the invitation envelope, or have it printed on the bottom of your wedding invitation.

Your wedding website is also a great place to explain wardrobe recommendations for the wedding, and any other pre- and post-wedding celebrations you're planning.